The Day I Lost My Dad, My Inheritance, And My Baby…
The month of July has got to be one of most life changing periods of my life.
The new lows of my life that tested my core belief and my opinion of the world, my mindset and the core values that drives my decision. It was the time that I lost my dad, my inheritance of millions of dollars any my unborn baby… 
More than 1 month ago, it was a joyous occasion, as we found out that my wife was pregnant. 
It was pretty unexpected and definitely not planned for. But, since it happened, my wife & I was pretty elated. However, joy are sometimes short-lived. One day before my wife and I were supposed to go to Hong Kong for a holiday, there was some bleeding at the nether regions, so my wife went for a checkout at her gynecologist.
The doctor saw the bleeding and immediately admitted my wife to the hospital. To cut the long story short, the baby couldn’t make it and yes, we lost the baby. I experienced a lot when we lost our baby. I realised that people tend to protect the ‘weaker’ sex, which is my wife. Everyone asked me how she is, how is she taking it in, and that I must take care of her. Hmmm, I was thinking, what about me? Has anyone actually realized that the father of the baby can be affected as well? I thank the people who had asked me how I felt, Aloysius, Andrew, Stuart and a few others. For the rest, be ashamed of yourself! muahaha. Just Kidding, I understand…
Fast forward a couple of weeks later, and my mum came to Singapore to look for me & my 2nd sister for dinner (my parents live in Johor Bahru). She said she had something important to tell me. Gosh, I was so afraid that it was regarding her health as she had heart & kidney problems. Anyways, I brought my family to a Japanese restaurant at Anchor Point, it’s not too noisy and the food is great, so it was pretty suitable for this occasion.
After the dinner started, my mum took out a huge stack of documents from those brown envelopes (very much like the ones that doctors put your x-rays). I was fearing the worst actually. But ‘luckily’, the story had a twist. Instead, my mum showed my sis & I photographs of my dad’s affair with many other women and that my dad had sold away ALL the properties we have and ran away with millions of dollars…
Apparently, my dad had another family outside and a daughter that’s 14 years old! OMG! To top things off, from the photographs & the money my dad gave to his women, we think he has at least 4 mistresses. The worst thing is, those women are not even pretty! Yucks! It’s like screwing those old prostitutes from Petain Road! YEEEEW!
As my mum told the stories of dad’s womanizing ways, I was very disgusted. I think I have high tolerance for a lot of shit in my life, but to some point, I really couldn’t listen more. There’s so many women, so many shameful stories that I just can’t pen it down. One of those I cannot forgive is screwing around with a woman who’s husband had a stroke and is actually IN THE HOUSE while they are doing it. My dad bought one of those high-end apartments where we live for my eldest sister. So he always say he’s going to the gym, but actually, he’s in that house fucking that woman while her husband is still there, alive & kicking! >:(
Anyways, there’s so much more ‘juicy’ stories, but I don’t think I should really continue.
To cut the loooooooooong story (my mum told stories for at least 2 hours), this has really impacted me.
My family is really well to do, back in Malaysia, a huge house and a larger garden. A car porch that sat park at least 7 cars, we own at 5 cars and millions in the bank. I never take money from them, but to think that I lost my ‘inheritance’ overnight! Ha!
All in all, 2 of the 3 most major things that has happened to me, happened all at once. With my values changed, I realized that family really rise above all matters. I’ve always chased the millions all these years and neglecting my family. Sometimes, I do wonder if I’ve spent more time with my family, would all these happen?
As such, I decided to be an full time Internet Marketer, relinquishing my job as the IM Specialist at AKLTG. With more time at hand, I’m able to see my mother more often. With more time, I’m really able to fulfill my dreams of the lifestyle & money that I want. Training and helping others have always been a passion. No matter how little it pays me at the moment, seeing the results of my participants/students that went through my course always warms my heart. To receive emails from them thanking me on a job well done and finding out months later that they are beginning to do well in the areas of IM does bring tears to my eyes, figuratively speaking.
With my decision, it does send ripples of damage throughout AKLTG, especially to my mentor Stuart Tan. Though, I’m taking the leap of faith to run my business, I’m still training the IM courses that we’re running. Even so, I do know that my mentor has been deeply affected by my decision, especially when it came all of a sudden. But honestly speaking, to me, it’s a change of life values. I do hope that his Google Alert catches this post and understand from my point of view.
Stuart Tan has been a guiding beacon to my IM career and my personal development. AKLTG’s flagship program Patterns Of Excellence (POE) has changed my life and showed me more ways to be successful in my life. For this, I’m truly grateful.
Then again, I’m never really leaving, I’m only not getting paid for the things that I don’t want to do (the daily operational stuffs) and concentrating on the things that I provide the most value: Ideas Mastermind. In exchange, I get time to run my IM business and spend quality time with my mum & family.
For the readers in this post, I know that this has seriously deterred from the usual IM, technical or mindset post that I usually do, but I feel that it is necessary for me to do so. No matter what business we’re running, whether it’s trading, IM, real estate or even financial planning, we must be true to our self and be aligned with my core being. Understanding what we truly wants and is good at, follow your passion and the money will come. Honestly speaking!
Hope this loooong post has been beneficial to you to look within and the people around you. All the money chasing game can be tiring sometimes. Stop and to appreciate your family and the friends who’ve always been with you.
With this, I see you at my next post.
August 16th, 2008 at 12:53 pm
lemme give you a big fat hug when I see you again
August 18th, 2008 at 2:55 am
Hi MC,
So sorry to hear about the loss of your baby. Be strong and send our regards to your wife.
I can fully understand your decision for more time with your family and i support that.
Previously i was in a semiconductor company and was working like nobody’s business, working overnight up to 4 days in a week. Though i was doing well at work, i hardly have time with my family.
Life took a twist when my mum suffered a stroke, my grandfather-in-law passed away and a newborn baby came along when i realised i needed time for my family so i decided to quit.
As life turns out, my grandmother passed away when i was serving my resignation notice and a month later, i lost my dad (heart attack). I keep blaming myself for being unable to spend more time with them and when i finally decided to, i lost them forever. This is life.
After changing a job, i did have more time with my family but i was diagnosed with prediabetes and keep losing weight and even doctors cannot explain why. This is the reason why i ventured into IM so that i can spend even more time with my family.
Therefore my advice to everyone is to take good care of your health and also spend time with your loved ones because life is always unpredictable.
August 21st, 2008 at 3:53 pm
Tofu:
All I have to say that I’m glad I read this post. I totally agree with you on several points. Doing what I love is important.
Cheers.
*We have a common thing:making differences*
August 29th, 2008 at 2:59 am
There is a saying that before you can rise to success, you’ll have to hit the rock bottom first. Survive through the worst and you’ll be prepared to face anything that comes along in the future.
I’m sure you can build a million dollar fortune with your own hands, jia you!
Warmest Regards,
Eileen
August 29th, 2008 at 6:06 pm
Hey Ming Chern,
Reading your story invoked something in me as well, in many areas. In fact, I can relate to many of which you’ve said, especially the part where your father was concurrently holding an active relationship with many other women.
My father too, married 2 other women (maybe more?) and even though my mother discovered it years back when I was still going to primary school, my mother forgave him. However he took advantage of my mother’s kind heart and committed more gross acts - looking for MORE women, cheating everyone, had a son with another woman, and massive lies. (Guess men like these have a lot in common?)
Career wise, he was successful but due to his arrogance and womanizing habits (oh the lies too, don’t forget that), everything came crumbling on him like a deck of cards. I’m glad me, my mom and sister are spared from sharing his misery.
Last time I checked, he’s driving a rented car instead of a Jaguar, lost most (if not all) of his business, all the women left him (some were innocently cheated)… and he’s now lonely. Ironically, he now goes to church - the very thing he cursed when he was at his prime.
Anyways I know you’ll make it, Ming Chern. I personally think this is not going to solve itself overnight but tough men lasts, not tough times.
===> YOU ARE THE TOUGH MAN!!
September 2nd, 2008 at 2:42 pm
Cherish only the good old memories and live the present no matter what lies ahead
Kelvin,
IMS Sept’07 batch
September 18th, 2008 at 12:12 pm
Hey bro!
My heart goes out to you. Take time to heal k.
October 5th, 2008 at 3:06 pm
Dear Ming Chern,
I finally realised why I was not able to touch base with you. No wonder the email I sent to you did not get answered.
So sorry for the turn of events.
I salute you for taking the decision to spend more time with your family. Take care.
October 10th, 2008 at 4:52 am
MC, I’m glad you’ve taken such situations and turned it around. I’m sure you can do it. Let’s work together for our future. Whoosh!
October 13th, 2008 at 6:20 am
Hi Ming Chern
So so sorry to learn about this. Thanks for sharing. Time will heal all wounds I believe, all the best and cheers to a better tomorrow.